(764):
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to eat popcorn with a unicorn? I just did.
It Would be awesome. No question.
But if you didn’t share, it could impale you
awesomely dangerous, unless it used the horn as a kabob & shared
(216):
I can’t find my tiara. So upset right now, you have no idea.
…..Want a pair of sparkly, silver princess gloves?
See, this is why we’re best friends.
(814):
- i wish you were here, i want to hold you
- would you still want to hold me if i was a rabid racoon trying to eat your face off?
- possibly
(412):
Cheese is forbidden in my household.. We dont speak of it
Its eating is frowned upon immensely
We refer to it as dairy-that-must-not-be-named
If we see it we look away in shame
its secretly tearing my family apart
I start crying when i see it because it led to the death of my late uncle
I’ve lost 3 dogs and a neighbor to the shameful mold
The fermentation process leading to it should never happen, it hurts too many people
Its so evil, I feel like a slave to its colonies of live bacteria. And yogurt, that shit is killing me slowly every day
(314):
So I had a dream that Detective Stabler from Law&Order SUV karate chopped me in the throat and I stood there for like half an hour holding my throat and crying.
(636):
When I was like 12 I would dress up my penguin on club penguin as a boy and then go up to girl penguins, put a heart sign and be friends with them, then take them to my igloo, secretly defriend them and ask them if they wanted to know a secret. Then I told them I was a girl and logged off so they wouldn’t report me! Hehe I was an evil little child! :)
Wow….you are the funniest person I know!:)